The Blame Game
Posted: Tuesday, October 05, 2010
by Grace O'Malley
"No one is willing to acknowledge a fault in himself when a more agreeable motive can be found for the estrangement of his acquaintances" ~ Mark Twain
The blame game. Don't we all do it?
It starts when we are children "The dog did it" "I don't know" "It wasn't me" "I swear I didn't do it"
By the time we are adults we have learned to hone our skills. What do we do? The report you were supposed to finish hasn't even been started: the computer dumped it before you could back it up. You burn dinner because you were on Facebook and forgot to check it: the oven is not working right. You crash into the car in front of you because you were on the phone and not paying attention: the idiot cut in front of you and slammed on the breaks.
Uh huh. Right.
Do not get me started on the people who enjoy clawing their way up the ladder of success by taking credit for another's accomplishments and blaming who they can for their failures. Instead of getting ahead by hard work and knowledge, they climb over the bodies of those who were foolish enough to get in their way.
Some take it a step farther.
Do you all remember many years ago when the story surfaced about the woman who went to McDonalds, ordered hot coffee, promptly spilled the coffee on herself, then turned around and sued McDonalds for millions? It was such an outrageous story at the time, and still is. Yet, because she believed she was wronged, she took the issue to court, sued, and won. Welcome to the world of litigious blame. Let the games begin.
It baffles the mind that someone has the utter gall to sue an organization because they were stupid enough to not use common sense. What is worse is that juries agree. They enjoy sticking it to the companies with big dollar signs after their names. Why? It is easier to blame someone else than admit we screwed up.
And we do.
Screw up.
Frequently.
We are human and not infallible. The idea is to admit when we do wrong, learn from it and try not to do it again. But no that is not the way some do it.
Maybe it is time we all take a lesson from Henry Ford who said:
"Don't find fault, find a remedy"
The blame game. Don't we all do it?
It starts when we are children "The dog did it" "I don't know" "It wasn't me" "I swear I didn't do it"
By the time we are adults we have learned to hone our skills. What do we do? The report you were supposed to finish hasn't even been started: the computer dumped it before you could back it up. You burn dinner because you were on Facebook and forgot to check it: the oven is not working right. You crash into the car in front of you because you were on the phone and not paying attention: the idiot cut in front of you and slammed on the breaks.
Do not get me started on the people who enjoy clawing their way up the ladder of success by taking credit for another's accomplishments and blaming who they can for their failures. Instead of getting ahead by hard work and knowledge, they climb over the bodies of those who were foolish enough to get in their way.
Some take it a step farther.
Do you all remember many years ago when the story surfaced about the woman who went to McDonalds, ordered hot coffee, promptly spilled the coffee on herself, then turned around and sued McDonalds for millions? It was such an outrageous story at the time, and still is. Yet, because she believed she was wronged, she took the issue to court, sued, and won. Welcome to the world of litigious blame. Let the games begin.
It baffles the mind that someone has the utter gall to sue an organization because they were stupid enough to not use common sense. What is worse is that juries agree. They enjoy sticking it to the companies with big dollar signs after their names. Why? It is easier to blame someone else than admit we screwed up.
And we do.
Screw up.
Frequently.
We are human and not infallible. The idea is to admit when we do wrong, learn from it and try not to do it again. But no that is not the way some do it.
Maybe it is time we all take a lesson from Henry Ford who said:
"Don't find fault, find a remedy"
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More commentsI like the way everything seems to spill trippingly off your fingertips- Good smooth writing- Always- Ella
In the McDonald's case, she accepted fault for spilling the coffee. She sued because of the severity of the burns she received because McDonalds served the coffee at a temperature grossly above what was allowed by law. Her's was not the first complaint, and a pattern of unwillingness to comply with the law was established, and that is why 12 people on the jury agreed that McDonalds was negligent, as a reminder to them to remedy the situation so that others wouldn't get scalded as well. She received no monetary compensation by the way, but McDonalds did then comply with the law. I understand this was simply an example for people not willing to take responsibility for their actions, but I think a big part of that is a societal acceptance of judging and punishing. If not for this perverse, incessant need in our society, I think more people would be willing to do so. We do so love to throw the first stone. Makes us feel, oh so good, and somehow, better than those who receive the stone's blow. Another great article. Thank you.
And that was a "Lady".
Thank you for sharing.
Grace, I love your abstract rights ........ We are human and fallible. The idea is to admit that when we do evil, learn from it and try not to do it again ......I can add what you want ,first do same for others.
Hi Grace.I'll admit that this once I read the other comments before adding my own. Those who seemed to speak out in defense of the woman who spilled her coffee would seem to have a point. But that does not invalidate the issue basic to your article. Very few people are indeed willing to take responsibility for there mistakes and misdoings. And finding fault with others while not acknowledging your own is just plain mean.I too like that last quote. It's brilliant.Hugs, Dianne
I wish I had a thought of that spilled coffee idea. I would be rich right now. But in actuality, how do we know it wasn't a plot or scheme to retaliatate against McDonalds? I think it was insane the entire case, and real justice was not served.
I think one of the greatest things we can learn is "owning up"...."I am sorry, I made a mistake, I wasn't paying attention, I wasn't listening, I opened my big mouth when I shouldn't have...." Admitting it is the first step to finding a cure and being aware and maybe not doing it the next time.... having said that - I have now blown up eggs 3-4 times while getting carried away writing for Searchwarp!
I think Dale Carnegie said it best: “To change people without giving offense or arousing resentment: Talk about your own mistakes before criticizing the other person.”
I was running a restaurant at the time of the McDonald's incident, and I remember we had to adjust the burners on the coffee to prevent the coffee from getting too hot. The phrase 'hot cup of coffee' went out the window, of course, partly because of this lawsuit. Too bad, and although both parties are to blame (the woman for wanting a big payday, McDonalds for having their coffee way too hot), this is just another example of 'only in America'. Anyone else burned by this coffee would have probably just gone inside for another cup, cursing their own stupidity.
Well done, as always.
Very nice as usual and very true. We love to blame.
Where are you these days Grace? What happened to the profile picture and bio etc.? Are you planning to leave SW?
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